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Begin To Begin

from Brake Light Red Tide by Field Report

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lyrics

the places that I’ve been and may never see again:
I won’t say haunted, but I get visited
It follows me around, wherever I go
So all things being equal, lately I just stay at home
and listen to the refrigerator hum
and quietly hum along
and wait for it to come

begin to begin to begin to begin

I swear, dog knows it first-- I can see it in her eyes
when she seeks me out, checks in, curls up and and resigns
It’s like she heard music from the other room
that she recognized--
some theme song from a rerun on the air all the time
She don’t like it, she don’t hate it, she just knows that it’s on
and that means there won’t be conversation until the show is done
that’s when I zone out and disappear and it has begun
my darkness comes in darkness and it stays til it is done

begin to begin to begin to begin

blinding light
trip and fall
I’m a bat trapped in the house
clicking for the walls
cause I don’t cry out no more--
I just tiptoe down the hall
baby, keep on sleeping

I get out the house and it’s just before last call
caramel brown bottles, Packers shit is on the wall
suck it down, check the clock, beg another round
bartender says, “your idea of fun always feels like a breakdown”

text my therapist two four six am
“hey it’s chris it’s been a while it’s happening again
I’ll take the first hour you can get me in”
begin to begin to begin to begin

credits

from Brake Light Red Tide, released April 28, 2020
Christopher Porterfield - vocals, guitars, pad, programming
Daniel Holter - noise treatments

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Field Report Milwaukee, Wisconsin

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